Monday, October 21, 2013

No Texas

Welp- the boyfriend and I broke up. (back in Sept)
It's been rough. Very rough.
Many reasons but one in particular was his thinking I didn't want to move down there. I'm not going to lie- it wouldn't have been an easy move for me but in the end, I would have done it for us. I would've made the most of it and had a successful career down there. In fact, I did want all of that, the wonderful partner in crime, the house, the yard, etc..I get caught up in things, fantasies, dreams and I think a lot of it he took literally. My friends who know me, know that it is just that, a dream. For example, I would love to live in Italy and work in fashion there- now lets be real, am I going to? Not at all, its too far from my family. I know even from my last post, the few weeks I had been starting the semester, I was getting excited at the prospects of the fashion industry. So I'm guilty of getting excited.
I just can't help thinking that the move was just around the corner and he freaked.
I also can't help thinking that wow, the guy who was supposed to love me forever, had a ring for me and a house for me and everything, isn't willing to try and work through a terrible fight. I know we all need time to heal from bad arguments. I'm willing to forgive but I guess he's not. and that hurts the most. letting go hurts second most.

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